leaves husband to maintain parents' house

Dear Pastor,

I am 43 and living in my wife's parents' house. I have been paying for everything, including mortgage. My wife's parents migrated. The agreement was that we would pay the mortgage. That is what we were doing.

My wife and I do not have children. She left me and went on a vacation. To this day, she has not returned. She is living with another man. I am here alone. My wife told me she is no longer interested in having a relationship with me. She is not returning to live with me.

I contacted her parents and asked about the house. I wanted them to sell me the house, but they are not interested in selling. I spent a lot of money to maintain the house because they were my in-laws. I believed we were one family.

My wife has got it into her head that I am having an affair with another girl. Nothing can be further from the truth. I am not a saint. I only started to go with other women when it was clear my wife was not coming back to be with me.

How could I get back all the money I have spent on the house? Pastor, what would you do?

P.T

Dear P.T.,

I think you need to go see a lawyer. You have put a lot of money in this house. The question is, did you have a written contract with the parents of your estranged wife? Your wife and yourself were supposed to pay the mortgage. That sounds like that would have been the amount of rent they were charging. The house was just left in the hands of your wife and yourself.

As their daughter and son-in-law, they probably expected both of you to take care of the house.

Now that your wife has left you, you are in a dilemma. You believe it is hard for you to leave that house after paying so much for the upkeep, etc.

Your in-laws are not willing to sell their house. It is part of their assets. They are probably looking forward to returning to Jamaica when they retire.

A lawyer, I believe, is the best person to give you advice on this matter. Your wife has decided she is not coming back to live with you. You may want to discuss that with your lawyer too, but that aspect of your life is easier to deal with than the house.

Pastor