Dear Pastor,

I am going to be 19 early next year and my boyfriend is 24. He wants me to have his first child. I also want a baby, but I don't want to get pregnant in my parents' house. He got a house through National Housing Trust recently, but he has not moved in as yet. He has always wanted me to live with him, and he said when he got his new house, we would move in together. His parents are overseas and he lives with his younger sisters. He also wants to meet my mother. I am afraid because I have never introduced any of my past boyfriends to her. so I told him soon.

I really love him. He treats me extremely well, and he has two jobs. Pastor, should I move in with him and have our child, or should we go out of the country to a small island as we planned and have the baby and come back and then tell my mother afterwards?

Please give me your advice.

S.D.

Dear S.D.,

I cannot encourage you to have a child out of wedlock and move in with this man. You are 19 and you do not have to be in any hurry. I would have loved to hear what plans you have to further your education. I do not doubt that you love your boyfriend, but this scheme that both of you have talked about is nonsense.

There is no guarantee that he will be with you forever, so you should stay right at home with your parents. Give yourself some more time to mature. If this man wants to move you into his new house, he should first marry you.

Introduce him to your parents and tell your mother that he wants you to live with him and to have his baby. I am sure that she would discourage you from doing so right now.

Please let me hear from you again.

Pastor