Dear Pastor,

I am a Christian. I have been since age nine. I am in my last year at college. In my first year, I met a young man. By the second year, he and I became engaged. He is also a Christian. We are both virgins. We will be getting married next Friday. I am somewhat scared because I don't know what to do when it comes to sex. What do you suggest?

Christian

Dear Christian,

From the tone of your letter, it seems as if your pastor has not met with your fiance and yourself for counselling sessions. If you had met with him, you wouldn't have asked what to do because, during premarital counselling, the topic of sex would have been discussed, including how to handle your first experience, and also how to handle your inhibitions. I suggest, therefore, that you ask your pastor to take the time to spend a few hours with your boyfriend and yourself.

I assure you that sex is not something to be scared of. As virgins, you both might suffer a little discomfort but the pleasure of the sex will supersede the discomfort. If it is possible, at all, try and purchase the book, 'Intended for Pleasure', by Dr Ed. Wheat.

You could learn a great deal from this marvellous book. May the blessing of God be on your man and yourself.

Pastor