Dear Pastor,

When I was just a young child, not even 10, I was raped by a relative. He was an adult. He continued to have sex with me, but I was too afraid to tell my parents. I contemplated taking my life and I hated myself. Sometimes I sit and consider what I went through. Sometimes I wonder what I could have done. I was so scared to talk as a child.

I didn't finish school. I have a boyfriend and all he wants is sex. He would have sex with me day and night if it were possible. It is not only one cousin who raped me and I couldn't do anything about it. My boyfriend is good to me, but he loves sex too much, but I have to continue to give him to keep the relationship going.

P.L

Dear P.L.,

You said you were scared to tell your parents about the sexual abuse that you endured. Your male cousins were beasts! They took advantage of you. They robbed you of your innocence. You were helpless. Although you did not mention it in your letter, I am sure they threatened you that they would do something bad to you if you reported them. And maybe you thought that your parents and others wouldn't believe you either. I am really sorry to hear about what you had to endure.

Concerning your boyfriend, you love him. Your only complaint about him is that he likes too much sex. Perhaps you believe that if you were to say no to him at any time that he would leave you, and you cannot afford for that to happen. You did not mention whether you are working. I hope you are, but if you are not, please try your very best and get yourself a job.

I also suggest that you commit yourself totally to God. Read your Bible and pray. Attend church regularly. Try also to learn a skill. God is able to help you. Encourage your boyfriend to attend church, too. If both of you really love each other, you should plan to get married, but before you do, make sure you receive pre-marital counselling. My prayers are with you.

Pastor