with Shelly-Ann Weeks

It is the 21st century, and we have become very attached to technology and our devices, so much so that it is virtually impossible to see someone without a cell phone, tablet, laptop or all of them together. Daily activities seem to always include these devices, even something as mundane as going to the bathroom. People now have the desire to record their whole lives and post it to social media. With all of this online activity, it's no accident that these activities affect relationships. Whether we like it or not, our online activities affect how we relate to each other, so here are some realities that we have to deal with:

Being on Facebook can lead to divorce.

A new study found a correlation between social-media use and divorce rates in the United States. Researchers from Boston University and Pontificia Universidad Cat-lica de Chile found that a 20 per cent annual increase in Facebook enrolment was associated with anywhere from a 2.18 per cent to a 4.32 per cent increase in divorce rates, depending on the model used. Similarly, the model from individual survey results predicts that someone who does not use social media is over 11 per cent happier in his or her marriage than a heavy social-media user. Source:

http://www.cnbc.com/id/101819591

Sexting is considered cheating

Once upon a time, a person had to actually touch someone other than their spouse sexually for it to be considered cheating. Now, with the advent of social media, sending nude photos via text (sexting) also qualifies. In a YouGov poll of 1,000 US adults commissioned by the Huffington Post, 85 per cent of female respondents deemed the non-physical act dishonest, as did 74 per cent of men. Source: http://www.dailymail.co.uk/femail/article-2358242/Is-sexting-cheating-Overwhelming-majority-men-women-say-YES—s-physical- contact.html#ixzz3bq6pOrcA

Relationships are being formed online

Online dating has gotten very popular, and along with all the social-media applications, meeting someone online is very easy. Persons are forming passionate relationships online. Some relationships last for years and, in some cases, the couple doesn't actually meet in person until they decide to get married. In the US, 17 per cent of marriages were with couples who met online.

Couples stay in touch over long distances with various apps

Individuals in couples sometimes have to be apart, but technology has made communication between them easier with video chat, text, and other applications. Skype, Oovoo, Google Hangout are just a few of the apps that are used to help couples keep in touch. Some get even more creative by putting on sexy shows for their partner.

I am a fan of technology, but like any tool, if abused, it can end up being more of an obstacle in your relationship. Some persons spend so much time on social media that it makes them incapable of communicating effectively with each other. One main challenge with some couples is respecting each other's privacy by not searching the devices to snoop. This can create conflict because it undermines the trust in the relationship. That is why it is important to be respectful of each other's privacy and trust that they will reciprocate. Have fun and stay sexy!

Send your questions or comments to sexychatwithshelly@gmail.com or Tweet me @drsexylive or Facebook www.facebook.com/allaboutthesexy.

Question

Dear Dr Sexy,

My boyfriend left his phone at my house accidentally and I tried to search it, but he had a password and I couldn't figure it out. It is frustrating, because I think he has something to hide. I am also a little offended that he doesn't trust me. Should I confront him?

Karen, Portmore

Dear Karen,

The fact that you are trying to get in his phone without his knowledge or consent shows that he is right not to trust you. I would not advise you to confront him - what would you say? That you tried to snoop in his phone, but you couldn't figure out his password? Maybe you should try trusting him and take it from there.

Good luck,

Dr Sexy-Ann