Dear Pastor,

I am 35. I have a child for a man who is 66. People told him when I got pregnant that he should run me out of his house because the child I was carrying could not be his. He is a very strong man. He knew that the child was his because I was living with him and we slept together every night.

Even when I was on my period, he would embrace me though we did not have sex.

My mother didnt believe the baby was his and told me it wasn't right to give him a jacket. I didn't talk to her for a month afterwards. We have made up now. She told me that she was not condemning me, but she did not want me to give him another man's child.

This man is very proud of his daughter. Now, he wants for us to get married. He has two houses and is retired. He has diabetes and is on medication. I have two other children and their fathers hardly give me anything for them. This man told me not to beg them any money for the children.

I love him very much. I am true to him, but if my own mother can question my loyalty to him, it is difficult to get angry at other people for saying the same thing.

Is anything wrong for a woman my age to marry a man who is 66 years old?

V.R.

Dear V.R.,

I see no reason why you should not marry this man. Both of you have been going together and you have a child together. He treats you very well and both of you are in love with each other. I expect both of you to continue to be faithful partners, so ignore what people are saying about you.

Plan your wedding, attend premarital counselling and get married.

Pastor