Dear Pastor,

I am having a problem with my boyfriend. I have a child but he is not the father. I have another man. This man is living with his child's mother but every chance we get we try to meet. He doesn't have a good job. He is a robot-taxi driver and I am in security. I am having sex with him for two reasons. I enjoy doing it with him. He is very loving.

My second reason is that he helps to pay my bills and 'partner'. I have two hands. I took one out for myself and one for him. When it was time for me to get my draw, I offered to give him some of the money. He refused to take it. When the time came for him to get his draw, he told me I could take it. I bought him a jeans out of his draw and put the rest in the bank.

My boyfriend is mean but he pays the rent. we have never been behind. The rent is $20,000 per month. He doesn't give me any money. he said I am working. I don't fuss with him because I am getting money from my other boyfriend. I know you will not agree with me, pastor but, please, understand.

My supervisor at work knows about my boyfriend who drives the taxi because when he wants to have sex with me he comes to the workplace. I let him in and we have sex in the car. My supervisor came and saw us having sex one night. he warned me and told me to make sure nothing happened at my post.

This guy is not going to leave me and I don't know how to tell him to go because he is everything to me, so tell me what to do.

E.N

Dear E.N.,

I am sure the man with whom you are living and who is paying the rent, would be disappointed and end the relationship were he to find out you have another man and having sex with him regularly. There is no question in my mind that you love the robot-taxi man more than the guy with whom you are living. However, you know that he is not going to walk away from the woman with whom he is living.

I cannot encourage you to continue to have relationships with these two men, it is dangerous. Your taxi man knows that you are living with another man. In Jamaica, we say he is the 'bunna man'. If you were living with him he wouldn't have liked the other guy to be the 'bunna man'.

The money you are getting now from this taxi man is helpful but he will never trust you. if the man at your yard should leave you, the taxi man will not marry you because he knows you are not a faithful woman. whether I am right or wrong, I urge you to end the relationship with one of them. That decision is solely yours.

Pastor