Dear Pastor,

I met a man two years ago in Papine. He gave me a ride in his jeep to Half-Way Tree. He asked me if I had a man, and I told him yes. He said, "Well, I want to be the other man." I started to laugh. He told me he was serious. He gave me his number and I gave him mine. The next day, he called me and my man was with me. When I realised it was him, I did not know what to say, so I told him to call me back.

My boyfriend asked me who was calling, and I told him it was a friend. He asked me if the friend didn't have a name, and I told him it was one of my co-workers who was checking up on me. He took my phone and checked the number, but I did not know had written down the number and that he had called the guy and told him not to call me back. That did not stop him from calling me.

He called me every day, and one day, I decided to meet with him at Devon House. I wanted to get some money out of him, so I told him that I was feeling pain. He gave me $10,000 to go to the doctor, but I did not go. I took the money and paid down on a refrigerator. I told my boyfriend that it was my partner money I used, and he believed me.

I can get anything I want out of this man. It took three months before we had sex. He is a good lover, but, pastor, I am getting afraid because he knows where my boyfriend works and my boyfriend will set him up. But I love him and I don't want to stop having sex with him. His wife works abroad. She is a nurse. He told me he is as wild as his father. He has a helper and she knows me, so sometimes I go to the house and wait for him. His helper will not tell his wife that I have been there. My boyfriend smokes a lot of ganja and he can't save money. I know you are going to say that I should stop seeing the guy, but he is a great help to me.

D.V.

Dear D.V.,

Just remember that you are living dangerously. This man told you he would be your other man. I suppose he meant that he would be like a spare tire. He wouldn't be on the wheels of the car every day, but you would use him as a spare occasionally. But as it has turned out, he is like your regular man.

Girl, you are brave! Your boyfriend knows so much about this man and you seem not to care because you are even going to his house and his helper knows you. You say she won't talk. You have great confidence in her. I hope you are correct. Although you do not wish for me to encourage you to end the relationship with this man, I am compelled to do so. Please walk away from trouble.

Pastor