Dear Pastor,

I read your column every day. I am 18 and pregnant. The problem is that I have been having sex with two guys, and not all the time had they used the condom. One of them uses it more than the other, but I don't fuss because I love them so much. The one who uses it more than the other is good to me. He is not mean. He takes me to and from school. He said he doesn't want anybody to see us going into hotels so we have sex in his car. I told him I missed my period and he gave me money to go to the doctor to find out whether I was pregnant but didn't go to the doctor.

I told the other guy the same thing and he told me, if I were pregnant, I should throw it away because he doesn't want any children. After I missed my period, he told me he has another girlfriend and she had two children for him.

I asked him why he he had not told me before, and he said nothing. He doesn't have a car and we used to rent rooms to have sex, day or night. He doesn't care, so if I am pregnant I would have to give it to the other guy, whether it belongs to him or not.

I don't know what to do because my mother always warned and told me not to bring a belly before I got something in my head. I told her she should not be negative. My father is a rum drinker and every weekend he comes home drunk. He doesn't know what time I come home on Fridays because he is always drunk. I had sex with another guy, my classmate, but I know the child is not his because he used a condom and did not even last a minute. Since we had sex, he doesn't talk to me, because every time I see him, I mock him and call him 'come quick'.

I am worried because I don't know who is the father of this child. If I am really pregnant, I am going to take the money from the guy who told me to have an abortion, but I am not going to do the abortion, because my boyfriend, who has a car, wants the baby. Some of my classmates are pregnant and some have children so I don't feel ashamed.

T.B.

Dear T.B.,

You are a very bad girl. There is not a feeling of remorse in you. At 18, you are a trickster. You have been flashing it here and there and very proud of it. The car man is not even aware you have another man in your life, and he was just as regular. I want to believe that you have learnt your badness from other women who, perhaps, are older than you, but I could be wrong. Some girls at your age, if they were to become pregnant, would fret but you seem to be very proud. The only concern you have is which of these men got you pregnant.

You love money, so you are willing to take money from the one who told you to abort the pregnancy. The car man is willing to support you, so you might be giving him a jacket. You ought not to be proud of the type of life you are living, but you are because some of your girlfriends have already become mothers and others are pregnant.

Remember, whatever happens the truth will be revealed. It is too late for prayer to change anything. If you got pregnant by the guy who told you he is living with another woman, so you should abort the pregnancy, prayer cannot cause a miracle to take place to make the car man the biological father.

I hope one of these days you will come to realise you are going in the wrong direction in life and need to keep one boyfriend. I would like to hear from you again. As old people say, "it is not something going, it is something coming." Let me know if you are, indeed, pregnant or perhaps you may wait until you have had the baby and inform me.

Pastor