Dear Pastor,

I am 23 and I have a boyfriend. I am working in Kingston as a live-in helper so I don't get to see my boyfriend often. I get a weekend every other week and I go down to the country. I heard that my boyfriend had another girl. I asked him about it and he told me it is not true.

Before I came back to Kingston, I went to the girl's yard and asked her if she and my boyfriend are friends. When her mother saw me, she asked the girl what I wanted and she told her that I was accusing her of trying to take away her man. The mother ran me out of her yard like a dog. By the time I got back to my house, my boyfriend was there waiting for me and was very upset that I went to the girl's house. He told me he didn't want the girl because she is bisexual. I told him that I wasn't troubling her, I just wanted to know if they were together.

Pastor, it hurts me to know that my boyfriend has another girl because he is not working and every time I go home, I take money for him. One of my friends told me that I should have grabbed the girl and fisted her. I did not go there to make war. I just wanted to know the truth. My boyfriend and I are still together. I don't know if he is talking the truth. I have never cheated on him since I am in Kingston, although I had chances to do so. Keep up the good work.

Y.S.

Dear Y.S.,

It is not every advice you can take from your friends. Some friends will lead you astray. You went to the young woman's house because you heard that she is having a relationship with your boyfriend. I don't think you should have gone, because you have no legal ties to this man you call your boyfriend. And if this man is having a relationship with the girl, it would mean that he has two of you and it is not the girl you should be annoyed with, it is the guy.

Her mother ran you out of her yard because of a truth. you had no right to be there, and if you had got into a fight with the girl, you would have been given the wrong. In fact, the girl might have given you a beating that some people might have said you deserve. Time will tell if your boyfriend is really having an intimate relationship with this girl. I hope that he is not lying to you and I hope also that he is not taking your money and giving some of it to the other girl.

Pastor