Dear Pastor,

I am 19 years of age and I recently migrated to the US leaving behind close friends, family and my boyfriend. I am not worried about my family because I know they will always be a part of my life. After all, they are family. It is my boyfriend who I am worried about.

My boyfriend and I have been best friends for the past eight years, but we have been intimately involved for two-and-a-half years now. We met in our first year of high school and we clicked instantly, but it wasn't until our senior year that we decided to take our friendship to a whole new level.

We have had our good and bad times, our ups and downs, just like any other ordinary couple. But the worst moment for us both was when I left Jamaica. We are still very much dedicated to each other and I personally have stayed faithful for the year that I have been here. I don't know if I can say the same about him. I mean, he hasn't given me any signs of him cheating, nor does he make me feel insecure. But everyone I speak to has nothing but negative feedback to give me. I try my best to block them out but it is a challenge.

My boyfriend and I speak to each other almost every day and we always talk about having a life together. If all goes according to plan, we will be getting married in our early 20's. I know I am young and marriage should be the furthest thing from my mind, but I have got my head screwed on very tightly and I know what I want.

I recently became a part of the US Army Reserve and will be starting college next year to pursue a career in medicine. I think I am well on my way to success. I am genuinely in love with my boyfriend. I really want things to work out between us, but do you think I am just putting my life on hold? Should I just forget him? Or should I follow my heart and work on what we have?

Please, pastor, I need your advice.

Helpless H.H.

Dear Helpless H.H.,

Let me try to help you. You cannot be sure about what your boyfriend is doing in Jamaica, neither can he be sure about what you are doing abroad. However, it is wrong for you to accuse him of going with other women. You have no proof that he is doing so. And it would be wrong for him to accuse you of going with another man.

Those who are saying negative things about him might not be speaking the truth. They should mind their own business. Pray and ask the Good Lord to lead and direct you. Don't be in a hurry to get married. But if you think both of you are ready, you should attend pre-marital counselling and follow your heart. I wish both of you well.

Pastor