I am hoping that all is well with you. I am a woman in my 50s, and although I am in this age group, I still need someone's opinion about a relationship I am currently in.

I met a gentleman on the Internet and we have met in person a couple of times. When we do see each other, the romance is great and he treats me exceptionally well, but he has a big problem: He is an alcoholic, and when he is drunk, he gets crazy. And when I say crazy, I mean that he is a madman. He is a professional and an outstanding member of his community.

The problem that I am facing is that I am fearful of bringing this man into my family. I have grown kids and I think I would be ashamed if he should get drunk around my kids. In other words, I can't see him fitting into my family. He has gone to rehab, but I have not seen him since. Friends have told me that he has resumed drinking.

Pastor, I do have strong feelings for him, but sometimes I feel like giving up on him. At the moment, I am confused. My brain wants to give up on him, but my heart is holding on. Please give me your advice.

Thanks and may God bless you.

Confused

Dear Confused,

I suggest that you continue to keep this man as a friend. He needs you. Alcoholics are lonely people and they need folks around them who would show them much love, care, and empathy. They don't need people who would condemn them because they are suffering from a disease that is hard to overcome.

He went to rehab and is out drinking again. He needs to go back, but no one should force him. He has to see that he is helpless and needs professional help. I agree that you should not introduce this man into your family. Perhaps the day will come when you will be proud to do so, but that day is far away.

Pastor