Dear Pastor,

I am a 19-year-old girl who can't find her place in this world. I have been through a lot over the past two years. I was in college, but I failed some courses and I don't want to go back. When I am around a lot of people and even family members, I still feel lonely. I am in search of happiness and belonging.

I have had sex with 16 different persons and even oral sex with one of the guys. None of my search for love and happiness ended well, so I am still lonely and depressed. Men just not working out for me and the only thing that can make me feel fulfilled is having a baby. I can't though because I am not employed and I am still living with my mother. I need your help. I don't know what to do or how to feel better.

Lonely and Depressed

Dear Lonely and Depressed,

First of all, I want to talk to you about school work. You failed some courses and I am sure that you felt very discouraged. No ambitious student wants to fail, but that has happened many times. However, when one fails an exam or more than one, that should help to motivate him/her to do better in the future. Failure is not always bad, because sometimes some people may have become too complacent and may not have spent enough time to prepare for exams. And when they fail, that becomes a wakeup call. So, please go back to school and don't give up.

Concerning the struggles you have had with boyfriends, I would suggest that you stop allowing men to toy with your body. You may need some help. Your relatives might not be showing you much love, so you have turned to guys for love and they have let you down.

As you see now, these guys are not helping you. So, leave them alone until you feel mature enough and able to make intelligent decisions as far as relationships are concerned.

Pastor