Dear Pastor,

Keep up the good work and may God continue to bless you. I met a man when I was 16 years old and he told me that he was living with his babymother. I worked with it and got involved with him. When I was 17, he got me pregnant. When my family members and I found out, we decided that I would have an abortion because of his situation with his babymother. He didn't agree for me to have the abortion, but still, he gave me the money to do it. After I had the abortion, he stood by me and nothing changed about him.

Later on, he decided to build a room for me in which I am living. He built the room for me because I was sleeping with my mother, even when I got pregnant, so my sister talked to my boyfriend about the situation.

texting and calling

His babymother found out about me and started texting and calling my phone, but I ignored her. I didn't argue with her, but three months ago, they both separated because of the things she was hearing that he had done for me. Now, they are back together because they have two kids together and he said he loves his kids and wants the best life for them, so he took her back. He also went to a family counsellor for advice because he said it was hard for him to choose his kids over me and also hard for him to choose me over his kids, and now he is back with his family and still doesn't want to let go of me.

I don't want to be involved with him anymore because with all this, I don't see a life or future with him. I really need your response. Please, pastor, I am confused and I don't know what to do. I am 18 years old and he is 32.

B.

Dear B.,

You don't want to continue having an intimate relationship with this man. I am sure you have told him so. And I am expecting him to beg you to stay with him. But as you rightly put it, there is no future between this man and you.

He told you he didn't want you to have an abortion, but at the same time, he gave you the money to pay for it. I believe that he did not want you to carry that pregnancy. You made a mistake by getting involved with him, but at least he has done something good for you by building you a room.

Try your best to go back to school, whether Heart/NTA or evening classes. You are young and you need to have an education.

Pastor