Dear Pastor,

I must say that I never thought that I would be writing to you for advice. I am 60 and have been married twice. My first wife divorced me. My second wife met in an accident and died. It took a long time to get over her death because she was beautiful in every way.

Now let me tell you what I am faced with. My second wife has a sister who has never been married and who is a woman of means. She is 65 and she is madly in love with me. I was not aware that she loved me. She used to ask me to do little repairs around the house and I used to just do the things an in-law would do to help out one who needs help.

Then I started to do errands for her, like going to the supermarket. Then she told her helper to cook for me, but she refused to take any money from me. Then she invited me to stay at her house on weekends. I said no, but I couldn't continue to say no because I found myself loving this woman.

One day, I told her that I am her brother-in-law, so we shouldn't go to bed. She said her sister is dead. The neighbours see me coming and going, but they don't know we have become lovers. Sometimes I wonder what I have got into, but at the same time I am not sure I want to get out.

This woman doesn't have children and she is not broke. It is not her money I want because I am very comfortable and I can pay my bills without her. I have two children and they are in good jobs. And we get along very well. They don't know that this woman and I are having a relationship.

Pastor, I want to know how you feel about this relationship. Don't hold back, tell me the truth. I want to hear from you.

E.G.

Dear E.G.,

If this woman and you go public about your relationship, you should be prepared to be verbally condemned by family members and friends. You will not escape their wrath. Many may call both of you nasty and cheap, and may even accuse both of you of having an intimate relationship before your wife died. So what should this woman and you do? It is a decision that you should make on your own. If you get married, it is not illegal. But many may say it is not morally right.

Pastor