Dear Pastor,

I am 20 and really need your advice. I am with a 27-year-old man and I am pregnant. He said the child is not his but I know it is his child that I am carrying. I haven't had sex with another man for more than a year. He is disowning the child because I found out that two other girls are also pregnant for him. One of them is my friend. I knew he liked her but did not know they were having sex. I called and cursed her. She told me I should not curse her because he forced her to have sex with him and didn't use a condom. She didn't mean to do it. I asked her how that could happen. She said he gave her a ride, came into the house and was fooling around her. I don't know the other girl.

When I confronted him, he said people lied on him. He is a bus driver. I still love him and don't want to leave him.

Right now, he is not giving me anything to prepare for the baby, and I am not making much from my job. The doctor told me I should make sure I get some rest as my blood pressure is high.

AS

Dear AS,

Your boyfriend has got himself into a predicament by getting three women pregnant at the same time, and is trying to lie his way out of his situation. He knows he is the father of the child you are carrying but is not prepared to accept that added responsibility. After you have given birth, a DNA test can be done to ascertain whether he is, indeed, the father. I hope he will give you money to assist in preparing for the birth of the child.

What of his relatives? Can they not offer you any assistance? You should approach them. Please, ask your relatives to assist you as well.

You should not believe the nonsense your girlfriend told you about this man forcing her to have sex with him. Why didn't she report him to the police if she is speaking the truth? It would be interesting to know whether he has accepted paternity of the child she is carrying.

Make sure you follow your doctor's advice.

Pastor