The worst thing I have ever done was to get involved with a woman who was 38 years old and I was 19. Now, I am 25 and she is 44. I have always been the breadwinner. We share a child together and she is the only reason why I am still around this woman. She does not have any future plans. I give her $6,000 per week and out of that she does not have to pay bills. I only eat dinner out of the money I give her. She doesn't prepare breakfast for me. I have to be telling her to keep the house clean and to wash and she is home every day. And if my child needs something, I have to find the money no matter how simple it might be because she never has money - not even a dollar out of what I give to her. So she has been my worst mistake and still is.

Young Man

Dear Young Man,

This woman who is 19 years your senior, saw you as a good catch. You were young and naïve and loved "big woman," so she took up the challenge. Perhaps your friends even teased you and congratulated you because your woman was a "big woman". And you got the "big woman" pregnant, and you have been spending your money on her.

Many young men like much older women. They go to bed with them then they brag about it. On the other hand, some of the women are not so open about it, but when it becomes known, they curse older men and say that it is because the older men cannot step up to the task.

The mistake you are making is that you regard this woman, not just as your sex partner, but as your helper. And she is trying to tell you that she is not in the house as your helper. The next step that she is going to take is to insist that you provide her a helper to wash, clean, and even cook.

Oh no! Don't worry to defend yourself. a decent woman would keep her house clean. It is the pride of every decent woman to have a tidy house. So if this woman is not that type, it is only a matter of time before this relationship blows up in smoke. Having said that, let me hasten to add that I believe that you are trying your best. However, $6,000 a week is not a lot of money to feed three persons. But I repeat, you are trying.

Encourage this woman to go and get a job and put the baby in day care. She needs to earn her own money.

Pastor