Dear Pastor,

I have a problem with self-confidence. I was raped by family members, including my own father. The sexual abuse started when I was very young. I have three children with three different men, but I think I am happy now with my present boyfriend. I have never talked about my past before. I need some advice. I have been through a lot. I am 25. Please, pray for me.

Abused

Dear Abused,

I regret hearing you were sexually abused by your male relatives, including your father. All these men should be in prison, every one of them. Perhaps, growing up, you kept quiet about the abuse because you were afraid. I hope you will teach your children to report to you anyone who touches them inappropriately. Sometimes children are afraid to report any form of sexual abuse. Sometimes they are not even conscious what others are doing to them as sexual abuse.

I believe you need therapy, so you should try and arrange counselling sessions with a family counsellor. Perhaps you can ask the minister of your church to recommend one who lives in your area, or not too far away. Perhaps your own pastor is a family counsellor. I believe he/she would be happy to help you. Any form of abuse can affect self-confidence. Therefore, when you meet with the counsellor, explain everything to him/her.

Concerning your new boyfriend, I am glad you are comfortable around him. I hope that he will treat your children, and you, well. My prayers are with you. May God bless you.

Pastor