Dear Pastor,

I am living with a man for 19 years and we share a child together. The child is 15 and she is in high school. Whenever we have an argument, this man remains angry for a whole month and we are sleeping in the same bed. He curses like a woman. He is building a house and it is almost finished. I am a hairdresser. I don't ask him for any money. I take care of the home he is building and now that the house is almost finished, he is showing me 'bad face'. He is always telling me to come out of his house.

The house we are living in belongs to a company. So is this what he is going to do to me after so many years of being together? He loves to keep malice. And he is always telling me that he has women. I don't know what to do with him. He is a very strong man. He said women are not short. I am so fed up. He calls me a whore. He also says that I am a lesbian. I don't even know anything about these people. I don't go out. I do my hairdressing at home. Please give me your advice.

Hairdresser

Dear Hairdresser,

Don't take what this man is saying lightly. Evidently he believes that you will have to continue to listen to him and to obey him. He believes that he can kick you around. But what he has forgotten is that the house that he is building belongs to you also. I suggest that you play it cool, and that you should seek the advice of a lawyer so that if this man plays the fool you will not be caught flat-footed.

Pastor