I read your column frequently and I am asking you for your advice. I'm in a situation that I can't find the answers to a question. I am 16 years old and my father and I are not getting along well from February last year. I have done wrong things that I can't change because they are already in the past. It has been paining me for these months because my father and I don't speak. He is the one who puts food on my table and sends me to school. I love him and he supports me. He had me from I was three years old when my mom ran away for reasons I don't know and won't hear the truth about it.

When I was younger, I brought a man in my father's house. I told people about what was happening in my father's house. I told people about what he says and does. He also says bad things about me to his friends then they come and want to be intimate with me but I don't give in to them.

I want to have a good relationship with my father, but I don't know how to approach him because he said if I say anything to him, he would lick me down, so I avoid him. I want to talk to him so I'm asking you if you can give me your best advice how to approach him. Please give me your best advice.

S.W. St. Thomas

Dear S.W.,

I suggest that you write your father a letter and tell him that you are sorry for the embarrassment that you caused him. Tell him that you love him and that you will try to do better. You should also try your best to do house chores and to be respectful to your father at all times.

I believe that you are a good young lady. You need some guidance. Make sure that you do not get advice from people who are critical of your father. You can talk to your guidance counsellor at school. And you can also seek some guidance from the minister of your church and his wife. Let your priority be your studies. Never neglect your schoolwork.

Pastor