Dear Pastor,

Greetings in the name of our soon coming King. Keep up the wonderful work you are doing. Let me tell you a little bit about myself. I am 43 and have two adult children, one daughter and a son. My daughter is married and my son is a police officer. I used to live in the United States of America. But after I bought a house, I travel back and forth. My main concern is for you to get me a man. I want an honest person. But please don't tell him about my house in Jamaica. I have my reasons for not wanting him to know.

Sometime ago I met a man. He said he loved me and I thought he really did. I took him to my house, but that was the wrong thing to do. He started to tell me that his children do not have food and clothes. And here he was having more than he can imagine, so I gave him money and food to give to the children. And then the school fee started to roll in, and then it was the rent to be paid. I told him to take the children to me and he started to make excuses. He told me that I wanted to know too much of his business. Shouldn't I know about his business when I was paying all the bills? I was tired of him, so I told him to leave.

I met another man who claimed that he was so much in love with me. I fell for his lies and his trap. He lives in St Catherine. I went to his house, which he said was his mother's place. He said he had to stay there to take care of her. That was not a problem for me. I love a person who cares about his family because I am also a family person.

We had sex. And after we were together for three months and going on to the fourth month, I took him to my house and everything changed. He brought his medication bills to me and his doctor bills. I asked him who used to take care of these bills, and why can't they continue to pay them. He cursed and told me that I am mean and I am going to church and no God is in me, because if God was in me I would have paid the bills without fuss. I told him that I was not involved in the relationship to take care of his bills because he was not my husband. He was 55. The last thing he told me was that he wanted a car. But, pastor, I don't even have a car. My children have cars, but I don't own a car. Yet, he wanted me to buy him a car.

I packed his things neatly and told him to go and never return. Pastor, one has to be careful because some men only want to use women. I have worked very hard in America and purchase the things I have. I bought my first house when I was 27. Nothing is too hard if one's mind is focused on a goal and one has determination.

C.R.

Dear C.R.,

We published this letter to warn women to be careful because there are many con men who are determined to use women and to live off them. You have had bad experiences with two such men. You seem to be a very generous person and these men were aware of it and took advantage of your generosity. However, after you came to realise that they were not sincere, you did the correct thing by throwing them out of your house. I hope that women who read your letter will learn from your experience and to be cautious.

Pastor