Dear Pastor,

First let me commend you on the wonderful work you are doing. I love your programme and I listen whenever I get the chance. I always wanted to write to you but I thought you might have hundreds of mail piling up and you might not get the chance to read mine.

Something happened to me this morning that I want to share and I would also appreciate if you could advise me on the matter. I ate breakfast then I put my cell phone alarm on and went to lie down about 11 a.m. I was practically naked. I was just in my underwear and bra. I laid on my back and covered myself with a sheet before falling asleep.

I was sleeping fine until some sexual thoughts came to my mind or my dream maybe. I dreamt of a naked light skinned woman lying beside me saying that she wished I would have oral sex with her. In the dream I was thinking about doing it to her. Then I remember my teacher said when we start dreaming about sex, some kind of demon is probably trying to have sex with you. I tried to wake myself up. I have tried to talk in my sleep before and heard myself but I couldn't this time. I tried moving my hands and rolling my fist but I couldn't. I just felt like I was being restrained like something was holding me down. I tried to say the Lord's name but there was no sound coming out.

After a few seconds I was released and I jumped up out of bed and wrapped a towel around me. I even took my Bible and was reading it. I was a little shaken up.

I am wondering if it is just my mind playing tricks on me, or probably because I have heard so many stories about oral sex, I thought it happened to me. I just have a feeling that something was holding me down. That has never happened to me before, chanting the Lord's name to wake up.

I am sure that I will never sleep naked again. Also I am home alone in a big empty house and I blocked the lights out of my room so I could sleep comfortably. I wasn't really tired; I just wanted to get some more rest so that I could wake up and exercise.

I need your advice. I am always depressed and sad about life. I wish I had someone to talk to. I live on my own. I rented a place in Kingston but I am from St Thomas. So many things happened to me growing up and I am surprised that I am still sane. I was almost raped when I was 11. I got raped by gunmen at 19. I was molested by my mother's boyfriend when I was little. I left home when I was 21 and I am on my own trying to make a living. I will be doing CXC in January. I swear if I didn't leave home I would go crazy.

All these things that happened to me I never told my mother. We don't have the kind of relationship where I feel comfortable telling her things. Her mouth wasn't hers. She was always telling people her business. I was afraid of the embarrassment so I didn't tell her anything. Thanks for reading my letter. It would really be nice to have someone to talk to and get some advice. Oh! I love hearing you laugh also. God bless you, pastor.

S.S.

Dear S.S.,

I want to assure you that nothing is wrong with you and what you have experienced is quite normal. It is quite common for people to feel that they have been held down in bed and are unable to move or speak. It has nothing to do with demons. May I suggest that you read what the famous psychologist, Sigmund Freud has written on the matter.

In your sleep, you dreamt about a woman suggesting that both of you should have oral sex. Perhaps you had sex on your mind. Perhaps in recent times you read or heard about oral sex and you had it on your mind, so you dreamt about it. I am not however suggesting that you would love to engage in such a practice.

I would suggest that you go to church and become involved in the youth movement. It is a good place to meet people in your age group, to socialise and to be active whatever outreach the young people are engaged in. You may also consider joining other youth groups in your community or social clubs.

Learn how to protect yourself. Do not go out with men you do not know very well. And even when you are going out with someone you know very well, call a friend and let him/her know where you are going and with whom.

Pastor