Dear Pastor,

Greetings to you and I hope you are in the best of health. I always listen to your radio programme but I have decided to write to you now.

I am 57 years old and my husband is 62. We are together for 24 years now, but we are married for nine years. He became a Rasta after we got married. He is a cheater, liar, bad-minded person and he is just plain wicked. He doesn't believe in God and so he does weird things.

He is with a young woman who was living with her man just a few yards from our home. Now, he moved her out of the man's house and is paying rent for her and her two children. What hurts me so much is that this woman tells me so much on the phone what my husband has told her. She is even boasting about the fact that she knows more than what I know and that I don't have anything to get because my name is not on the land title. She told me that he is going to buy her a house and I can't stop it. She is right because he went and borrowed $2.5 million by using his title and I guess they are building on a piece of land he bought her. My husband plans not to pay back the loan and then make the loan company auction his house to collect their money and I won't get anything.

I don't sleep with him or talk to him. I just hate to see him, but I leave it all to God. The woman my husband is with claims that she is a Christian and I was planning to report her to the pastor of the church she attends. Right now I am seeking a divorce but I was told that I have to be separated for a year, so that would be next year. I am under great stress because all sort of bad things keep happening around me.

My husband is taking things from our house and giving them to his woman. She asked me if I don't see that she is taking everything out of the house and they are only waiting on me to die. That really hurts me, so I told her that they might die and leave me.

She said I have to be doing what she is doing to the Rasta to keep him. I told her that I won't do that nastiness so she can keep him until he starts messing up himself. He is almost 40 years older than her and I know she is not going to take care of him when he is bedridden. He works very hard and he gives her $20,000-$25,000 every week. I get nothing from him, not even a dollar.

This woman boasts so much about what she is getting from him and that's all she wants. I am sure she doesn't love him and he is so blind. I told her that it is all vanity and one day God is going to stop them. She said God send the man for her as her puppet.

My interest now is to get a divorce very fast but I don't have the $70,000 to do it. Please let me know what you think. God bless you.

S.W.

Dear S.W.,

I am assuming that you have been to see a lawyer and that you have been advised how you may obtain a divorce. In the interim, I would urge you not to communicate with your husband's girlfriend. Say nothing to her, ignore her.

You need not fear about the matrimonial home. You would have to receive what is due to you. But you should tell the lawyer about the loan your husband has taken using the house as collateral and what are his plans.

If you are employed and you can get a loan, it would be in your interest to borrow the money and pay the lawyer to start the divorce proceedings on your behalf. Do not listen to the advice of friends. Follow the advice of your lawyer.

Pastor