Dear Pastor,

I am a 20-year-old woman and I have been reading your column from I was nine years old and I love your work. When I was 16, I met a man. He was 29 years old and I was not going to school, but I told him I was 18 years old. He lives in Old Harbour and I used to live in May Pen. Two months in the relationship I told him the truth about my age. He was upset with me but he said he loved me. He lives alone and he was in a good job.

I went to live with him when I was 17 years old and he took good care of me. One night when I was 18 years old, we were eating and my phone rang and a name came up, but it was one of my friends. When I came off the phone, he hit me in my face and told me that I was talking to men in his house. I told him it was a friend, but he still beat me. Later in the night, he told me that he was sorry and it will not happen again. I believed him and we had sex.

Now, pastor, this man started to beat me for everything. He beats me when he wants to have sex with me and I don't want to. He even beat me and told me to go down on him. I went down on him crying and he hit me in my face and told me I was not doing it well. I cannot leave the house or I can't look for my family or friends. I want to go back to school and he says I can't.

One day I went to look for my mother and when I was to go back home to him, I called him and asked him if I could stay with my mother because I was helping her with something and he said no I should come home when I was finished. I went home 11:30 p.m. and he was up waiting for me. He asked me what I was doing so long at my mother's house and if I went there to have sex. He hit me in the face and I was knocked out until 1 a.m. When I regain consciousness, he told me that he wanted something to eat, so I had to go and cook.

One morning about 3 a.m., it was raining and he wanted to have sex with me and I told him I didn't want to and he ran me out in the rain for about half an hour, and then he came outside for me and told me that he was sorry and we had sex.

When I was 19 years old, I ran away from him to Negril to stay with a friend and I was doing exotic dancing. I can't spell but I can read, so I could not get a good job. After three weeks in Negril, I found out that I was pregnant. I called him and I told him and he told me that he missed me so I should come back to him. So, I went back to him. When I reached home, he held me and kissed me. We had sex and when he was finished, he told me that I was at a man's house and he was going to kill me. He beat me so badly that I lost the baby.

When I went to the doctor, I told him that I fell down, but he knew that I didn't because my face was all bruised up. But because my boyfriend was there, I couldn't tell him the truth. Now, I don't leave his house. He buys the food and whatever I want for me.

Pastor, please help me.

S.G., St Catherine

Dear S.G.,

If you continue to live with this man, it is likely that he will beat you to death. You need to end the relationship with him and go back to your parents, even if you have to sleep on the floor at your mother's house, it is better for you to do so than to face the abuse from him. No woman should allow a man to beat her and to verbally abuse her. This man is a beast. And I repeat, if you don't leave him, you should tell your parents to prepare for your funeral because it is likely that he will kill you.

This man should be reported to the police. So when you are leaving him, let the police know and ask them for protection. You need an education. A no-good man would prevent his girlfriend from going to school. He wants you to remain illiterate so that you will continue to depend on him for everything. That is how he will control you. May God help you to wake up and remove fear from your heart.

Pastor