I am 19 and I am having a problem with my parents. Both of them are living in the United States of America. I am getting ready to live with them and attend college, but I don't want to go. I don't have a foreign mind and I do not want to leave my boyfriend. He is a musician and I love him very much. My parents hate him and that makes me hate my parents because they are trying to choose for me.

My father told me if I do not come to America and go to school he is going to "cut me off" and leave my boyfriend and I to suffer. My boyfriend will not make me suffer because his people have money and they can take care of me. Sometimes I feel rebellious.

Right now I am confused because if what I am thinking has actually happened to me, I couldn't look to my parents for any help. I have not seen my period for two months. My boyfriend said I am wasting my time in going to the doctor because he knows that I am pregnant.

D.F.

Dear D.F.,

You have only one person to blame for what appears to have happened to you, and that is yourself. You are old enough to know any woman who engages in unprotected sex exposes herself to pregnancy. You have a wonderful opportunity to live with your parents and receive a tertiary-level education, and you are throwing it away because you believe you are in love.

mistake

Some young people make the mistake in believing that when parents do not agree with their choices it is because the parents want to choose for them. That is not always the case. Sometimes parents are merely trying to tell children to wait until they have achieved an education.

You have declared that your boyfriend's parents can support you. It is unfortunate that you think that way because you should be thinking about receiving a good education so that you can support yourself. Although this young man has told you it is a waste of time to go to the doctor to confirm whether you are pregnant, you should ask him for money to see the doctor. If you are, indeed pregnant, you should tell your parents. Hopefully, they will still have you come and live with them and finish school.

In everything you do, endeavour not to be disrespectful to your parents.

Pastor