Dear Pastor,

I am a 19-year-old male and I am from St Mary. I grew up with my grandmother and she took me to church every week. I am still in church. My grandmother always talked to me about girls. So I didn't have a girlfriend until I turned 18. My girlfriend was 16 years old and when her parents realised that we were friends, they warned her not to talk to me because I am not educated. We continued to be friends and when they found out they beat her so she wrote me and told me that we couldn't continue.

One day, I went to town and a big woman called me and she asked me for a bus fare and I gave it to her. She told me she was from the country. She asked me if I have a girlfriend and I told her no. She gave me her number and I gave her mine. We started to talk on the phone and she came back to town to see me and we had sex. Because I knew that she was coming to town to see me, I took the bank book from my grandmother and I drew $5,000 from it and gave it to her.

Two days after I knew something was wrong. My penis became sick and I did not know what to do. Then it started to run. When I went to the doctor, the doctor told me that the woman gave me a disease. And I called her and told her that the doctor said that she should come in and see him or go to another doctor, and she told me that nothing is wrong with her. Now every time I try to call her on the phone I can't reach her.

Pastor, this woman should have told me that she was sick. She could have killed me.

C. L.

Dear C.L.,

It is unfortunate that your first sexual experience resulted in your contracting a sexually transmitted disease. This woman tricked you. You thought she was in love with you and that she cared for you. But you were wrong. By talking to you, she realised that you were naïve and she could get money out of you.

I am glad that you sought medical attention. And I hope that despite what she told you after you told her that she should see a doctor that she would seek medical attention. You should have known that you shouldn't have had unprotected sex. If you are not aware of that, this older woman should have told you that you should use a condom. She didn't care. She wanted some money from you, which she got.

I would suggest that you also do an AIDS test. Perhaps the doctor told you so, but if he didn't, I am suggesting that you do.

You did not mention what you do for a living. However, I further suggest that you go back to school and pursue a career.

Pastor