I have been married to this man for nearly five years. I recently found out that throughout the marriage he has had relationships with numerous women. Also, he has not practised safe sex, which has led to STIs, abnormal smears and, recently, STD. When I confronted him, he became aggressive, verbally and physically abusive. Women at work, home, and when I am out in public minding my own business, are harassing me.

I attempted to leave him on two occasions. The first time he threatened to shoot me and verbally abused me for more than an hour. The second time he threatened to break my neck, grabbed me by my jaw and threw me against a wall. I was unable to open my mouth for three to four days and could only drink fluids via a straw. I recorded both incidents on a phone. He deleted the first one but I have managed to save the second one. I have also left recordings for my children just in case he does kill me.

My family are unaware of my ordeal and he does not want me to tell them. I am going to as I need their help and support when I leave.

I am in the process of leaving again and I know this time I may lose my life but it is a chance I am willing to take.

He has no remorse for exposing me to STI's and a serious STD. I might not be so lucky next time as I may contract HIV from him, and that is not something I want to deal with.

He lies, cheats, steals and is very deceitful but I know I can make it without him, and I will. The Good Lord will get me through this like He has before.

Battered Wife

Dear Battered Wife,

I suggest you report your husband to the police. Tell them of the incidents and go see a lawyer. Tell him/her what this man has been doing to you and that you intend to leave him.

He/she would advise you how to go about it. You should also tell your relatives about your situation, what you are planning to do and ask for their support.

I am amazed you have remained with this man for so long. I think you are careless with your life.

Pastor