Dear Pastor,

I have a big problem. I was with a man for 11 years. We have two children together. However, he was very abusive. He beat me even on the street, so I left him and became involved with another man. This other man treats me very well. My children's father has come back, told me he has changed and wants me back. I don't see much change in him. The other guy really treats me well.

I don't know who to choose. I seriously need some help.

N., St James

Dear N.,

You shouldn't even allow your children's father to shake your hand. You shouldn't be wondering what to do. Both of you were together for 11 years and he treated you with utter contempt, worse than the most ragged door mat. He is a brute. You would be a fool to take him back. You have moved on with your life. You have a new lover who takes good care of you. Stay with him.

Perhaps your children's father is just jealous of you because he sees you are doing well. Let him support his children financially, but have nothing to do with him.

Pastor