Dear Pastor,

I would like to commend you on the good work you are doing and I would really like your advice. I am in my early twenties and I am with a guy who is 30. We have been together for three years now and it has been a bittersweet relationship.

He has done so many things to hurt me, and yet I try to forgive him and move past it because we love each other. He moved in with a woman when we were together and that was so hard for me. He soon broke it off because he realised she wasn't the woman he wanted.

We got back together and everything was ok for about a year and then suddenly he started seeing a co-worker that he said was a friend. We used to spend weekends together and all of that stopped. I went by his place unannounced and saw that his co-worker was staying with him and they had something going on.

I told him I wasn't going to stay if he is still with her and he asked her to move out. I looked past it once again and was trying to make it work until I saw some messages in his phone and now I know that they are still having a relationship.

I am at a point where I don't know what to do. I have been committed to him and I have turned down a lot of men because I am loyal to him. I always want to work it out because we aren't perfect. I am dedicated to him. I love him and care for him and yet they say a good woman is hard to find. When men get good women, they hurt them so much.

I would really appreciate your advice.

P.

Dear P.,

You are committed to this man but he is not committed to you. He is still playing around and he has not given any indication that he is ready to stop. Frankly, I think you are wasting your time with him. If you remain with him, you are going to have much heartache. Therefore, I suggest that you move on permanently.

Pastor