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Dear Pastor,
I am a female in my mid-20s and I need your advice about a situation. I met this young man when I went to Jamaica in 2009 to attend a funeral. He was the driver of the car we hired.
When I saw him, I instantly liked him and I found out that he liked me also when we started talking and getting to know each other. I live abroad and he lives in Jamaica, so it is a long-distance relationship. He has two kids and I have gone to Jamaica twice to see him. He doesn't have any babymama drama, thank God. I have met his family, including his children and they are very nice people.
I used to tell myself that I would never date someone who I could not see every day, because I wouldn't be able to trust that person. However, it seems like I have fallen into the very same thing. I am a Christian and he is not a Christian. Now, my mother does not seem to be too happy about him not being a Christian and having two kids.
My mother has talked to him and he has expressed to her the reasons why he loves me and so forth. He has been honest with me about his past relationships and I have done the same. Plus, the long-distance relationship she says never works out because of the many stories she has heard. I have heard many stories myself that made me say in the past that I would never do such a thing. Also, she said that the scriptures state that a Christian should not be unequally yoked with unbelievers.
I am growing to love this young man and he has expressed his love for me also. We talk on the phone every day to keep up the communication. I don't feel anything negative about him and he seems to be genuine.
He has never said anything negative about me living my Christian life, in fact, he encourages me. He wants to marry me and I feel the same. We talk about the future and we want the same things in life. He does believe in God so I pray with him and, encourage him to give his life to the Lord. However, I cannot force him because only God can save and change a person.
I don't want to disrespect my mother. She is a pastor and I want to be obedient to what she says. Yet, at the same time, I am torn because I cannot find it within me to end this relationship. Is it possible that God allowed it to be this way?
I await your response. Thank you and God bless.
Happily in Love.
Dear Happily in Love,
What is written in the Bible is there to stay. Some people may not like it, or agree with it, but it cannot be changed.
You have fallen in love with a man who is not a Christian. Your mother is unhappy about that, but you are determined to continue the relationship. However, you may do whatever you please. But the admonition in the Bible stands. Each person must give account to God about him/herself. Anyone who goes against God's law will suffer the consequences.
Pastor
