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with Blakka Ellis
If you're a woman living in some other country and you feel unloved, unappreciated and unattractive in your homeland, just come to Jamaica. Here, I can absolutely guarantee you that 'man gwine want yu'. Fi real, my sisters! If the men in your country are not noticing you, and you'd love to be told daily how hot you look (even if you know it's a lie), you need to visit Jamaica land we love, and feel the love!
I have regularly promised or betted with my women friends from foreign, whether dem young, old, slim, fat, black, white or blue, that within minutes of landing in Jamaica they'll have a man proposing to them; and so far I've been right every time. Of course, whether the attention and proposal is based on the desire for love and affection or influenced by the desire for visa and migration is another matter completely. But somehow, Jamaican men don't allow women to pass them without getting some extra special looks of admiration and/or some creative lyrics of love (or lust).
Yuh ever notice it? Many Jamaican men somehow see it as a sacred duty and an important demonstration of their masculinity to flirt with every woman they see. Even when it obvious di women wouldn't tek on some a dem if dem was di last man alive, some man have to try at every woman that dem meet. Is wha really tek some a dem bredda deh? To dem man deh, you're not really a man if you allow a woman to pass you peacefully and don't disrupt her day or invade her personal space with some school bwoy lyrics or some offensive suggestions - whether she wants it or not!
That phenomenon (if we can call it that) becomes more stark to me every time I'm outside Jamaica. When I'm in Canada, for instance, I see young women sauntering down the aisle in the train dressed in some revealing outfits, and I notice that not one man as much as shifts his eye or turns his head to gaze on her. I see these nimble young ladies bending over in their low-ride jeans and 'high-rise' G-strings tending to their bags, and I notice that no man dares to appear interested, or feels 'man-enough' to voice a comment. And I say to myself, 'If this was ever in Jamaica'.
Just yesterday in Toronto I watched a young female college student walk up to a bunch of 'thuggish-looking' high school boys and asked them to help her with a survey she's conducting. She was wearing a pair of tights so tight and pulled up so far it left nothing to the imagination. And none of those four boys made a comment or appeared to see it. They looked squarely in her eyes when they spoke to her. Somehow, I suspect that if a similar scenario happen a yard, the young miss would get some comments like 'yu a gwaan a way deh my girl!' or 'yow my girl, ah you alone fat so?' Or quite possibly something much more offensive - like one of the youths giving her a graphic description of what would occur if him 'ketch har one-away!'
And I don't think dem foreign youth deh more decent, or more respectful of women than our Jamaican youths. I figure the difference in response have more to do with the law and culture. In their country, certain laws are rigidly enforced, and a youth know that he can be prosecuted for everything from sexual harassment, intimidation, being a public menace or whatever, just by looking too hard or saying 'psst!' They also have a culture that puts greater value on personal space. Are we dealing with two extremes here? Is there some middle ground? What unnu think?
