Dear Pastor,

I am 19-year-old and my boyfriend is 20. A year ago we became friends. He told me that he had another girlfriend but he could help me to go back to school. As soon as I started to go to evening classes, I got pregnant for him and he started to keep away from me. He used to call me every day but that stopped. I found out that his other girlfriend lives at his parent's house where he is living. I asked him about it and he said it is true. He told me that he will support his child but the relationship between us is over. I told him that he couldn't walk out on me like that. I didn't see him for two weeks. Every time I called him his phone went to voicemail.

One day when I called and a lady answered and I asked her who she was. She said that she is his mother. She asked me who am I and I told her his girlfriend. She said that it is only one girlfriend she knows he has and that is his babymother. I asked her if I could speak to him and she said that he was in the bathroom. About an hour later, he called me and started to use expletives to me and told me that I should go and find the babyfather because he didn't get me pregnant. He gave the phone to his girlfriend and she too cursed me and told me that her man doesn't want me and that he said that I am ugly as a monkey.

I went to his workplace and talked to his boss and he promised that he would talk to him. He called me back and told me that he was sorry for what he told me but he didn't want his girlfriend to know that someone is pregnant for him. He gave me $10,000 and told me that he will support the child.

Pastor, I don't have any luck with men. Before I met this guy I had a boyfriend who did not tell me that he was married. I sent him a text message and told him how I enjoy having sex with him and his wife saw it and called me. I begged her pardon and I told her the truth. Now, I am going to be alone with this baby without a father.

T.T., Trelawny

Dear T.T.,

I am sorry to hear that you have had bad experiences with men. But, I hope that these bad experiences will help you to be stronger and wiser as you face the future. Most men, if not all, are liars. So as a young girl, you need to understand that when you meet a man and he tells you that he loves you, you shouldn't be too quick to believe what he says. And the worst thing you should do is to go to bed with him before checking him out, so to speak, to find out whether he is speaking the truth.

You needed help, so you grasped whatever opportunities that were before you, and regrettably ended up getting pregnant. You did not do anything wrong when you called this man. After all, you are carrying his child. I am glad that his mother told you that he is living with a woman at her house. He cursed you because you found out that he deceived you and he was ashamed.

On the other hand, I am glad that he gave you some money and that he has promised to support his child. After giving birth, if he does not support the baby, take him to court for child support. I wish you well.

Pastor