Dear Pastor,

I am a regular reader of your column and I started listening to your radio programme from I was 15. I am now 18. I lost my virginity to a 40-year-old man when I was 17. We started dating when I was 15. We trust each other and we are having a serious relationship. He is a security officer and he is very intelligent. We are having a happy relationship.

My parents know about him, but they do not know his age. He wants me to live with him, and go back to school. What do you think about it, pastor?

K. K.,

Dear K.K.,

If this man is interested in helping you to go back to school, he can do so without having you live at his house. You should continue to live at your parents' home, and you should inform your parents that this man is encouraging you to leave home and to live with him. You should not hide his age from your parents.

This man and you have been having sex. Remember that if you have unprotected sex you may get pregnant. This man is by far your senior, and I am wondering whether he has other women. It would be unusual for him to have lived as a eunuch until he met you and had sex with you. If that is what he has told you, you should not believe him.

I am afraid that this man may use you and after he is tired of you, he will dump you, so to speak. Therefore, you should not hide anything from your parents about him. Tell them the truth.

Pastor