Dear Counsellor:

My girlfriend died two years ago. I am now hearing rumours she may have died from AIDS. Counsellor, when my girlfriend took sick, she went to live with her parents. Putting things together, I have to believe the rumours because when I met her, she told me her boyfriend had died from some strange illness. I am now hearing it was AIDS. Since her death, I got involved with a married woman. I'm now very confused because this woman doesn't want me to use condoms and, to make it worse, her husband, a respectable church man, may be at risk. This is frightening! What should I do?

Worried Ex-lover

Dear Worried Ex-lover:

If your girlfriend died from AIDS-related illnesses, yes, it means you, and any other sex partners you may have had are at risk for HIV, the virus that causes AIDS. You have taken a very responsible approach but you must take it a step further by getting tested for HIV. The only sure way to know if you are infected with HIV is to get tested. You should also speak with an HIV-knowledgeable counsellor as soon as possible. You should stop having unprotected sex, this way you would prevent infecting your partner or re-infecting each other. Remember the woman you are now having sex with is married so, therefore, other persons are involved and possible others you don't even know of.

For more information on condom use, HIV/AIDS and other sexually transmitted infections, call the AIDS/STD Helpline at 967-3830, 967-3764 or 1888-991-4444 or write to AIDS Affairs, c/o the Star, 7 North Street, Kingston.