Dear Pastor,

I am 19 and writing to you because I feel guilty for something I did. My twin sister introduced me to a man, but she did not tell me he was her boyfriend. She just said this is so and so. She was hurrying to go to class. This man asked me if I needed a ride home and I said yes. On my way home, he asked me if I would like something to eat because he was hungry. He bought me some chicken and he parked his vehicle at a certain place, and we had the chicken there. He told me that looking at me it was like love at first sight.

While we were in the car, he started to play with me and I did not resist him. He asked me if I ever had sex and I told him yes. He started to suck my breasts, I lost control and we had sex. Instead of taking me home, he sent me in a taxi. When I went home, my sister asked me where I was because she went to class and got home before me. I had to lie to her. She asked me what I thought about her boyfriend, and I said, "which boyfriend"? She said the guy she introduced me to was her boyfriend. I told her I did not know that. I went into the bathroom and cried. She asked me if he did anything to me and I told her no.

The next day, I called him and asked him why he did that to me, and he said that he couldn't resist me, and it is just one of those things. My sister and I are very close. Do you think I should tell her what happened?

L.N., St Andrew

Dear L.N.,

This man is, indeed, a very wicked man. He took advantage of your naivety. He read you as a book. He doesn't love your sister and, by talking to you, he discovered you were easy prey. So, he did not spare you. He had sex with you and did not inform you that your sister was his girlfriend.

I am sorry you did not resist this man. I hope you would learnt from the big mistake you have made.

The question is, should you tell your sister what happened? If you were to tell her, she might blame you for consenting to have sex with him. Her boyfriend might convince her you were the aggressor and you threw yourself on him and he could not resist you.

Whether you are willing to take the risk is up to you. If you were to tell your sister and she believes you, she wouldn't want to have anything to do with him. If she doesn't believe you, the relationship she has with you, as her twin sister, will never be the same. It will be strained forever.

Pastor