I am in a relationship with an Indian man. He is 50 years old but I used to be friendly with a negro man. He went away, but he was deported back to Jamaica. Since he is back, he is doing everything for me to leave my Indian boyfriend and come back to him. And pastor, I don't know what to do because I love my Indian boyfriend that I have. But I love the negro man too. He was my first man.

Sometimes my Indian boyfriend is very moody and he has some dirty habits. In addition to that, he is much smaller than my negro boyfriend.

I am afraid to leave him. He is always warning and threatening me. He asked me to marry him, but I don't want to. I don't like his family. They are always interfering into our business.

S.C., Clarendon

Dear S.C.,

What would have happened if your old boyfriend wasn't deported back to Jamaica? I could answer my own question. You would have stayed with the Indian man and you would have felt very comfortable and happy with him. All this nonsense about him being small would not have risen. Now that the deportee is back and showing interest in you again, you are finding all different excuses for wanting to renew the relationship with the deportee.

Too many of you girls base your relationship on just sex and that is why you end up disappointed, broke, confused and depressed.

You have not mentioned that this man has been ill-treating you. That means he is trying his very best. So why are you tempted to move on? You say that he is always warning you, but you did not say why.

Whether you go or stay is solely up to you. All I can do is to wish you well.

Pastor