This is the first time I am writing to you, but I read your column in the paper and I listen to you on radio. I am not feeling good inside because I am living with a man and I have to fight with him to get money from him. I took him off the street after his wife left him. None of his children pays him any mind.

They really don't care about him. Whenever he works and gets his pay, if I don't meet him at the bar and take some money, he would drink it out. He is getting worse and worse, and he is telling people that I am getting all his money.

does not wipe

I am fed up with this man, but I don't know what to do. He has real dirty ways. When he goes to the bathroom and uses it to urinate, he does not lift the toilet seat. And he does not wipe himself properly. His briefs are always dirty. I can't stand it anymore. I have a days helper, but I am too ashamed to give her his underwear to wash.

He has a lot of mouth but he does not have any bedroom use. He lost his house. I don't know where he is going to go but I am going to ask him to leave. He is 64 years old and I am 50.

Pastor, people love you very much and I hope that you will continue to do your great work.

H.E.,

Dear H.E.,

What is the reason you got involved with this man? Is it out of sympathy? Were you in love with him? His wife and children abandoned him, why did you take him up? Do you believe that you would be able to change him? If you intended to change him, you have failed miserably.

If you wanted his money, he has proven that he has none to give you. He is broke. He can't keep money because he drinks too much. You shouldn't be running after him to take away his money on payday. He is not a good man. A good man will take care of his home first before going to drink with the boys. This man has serious problems. Perhaps that's the reason why he drinks so much.

He has too many problems for a decent woman. He doesn't even know how to take care of himself. If you want to give him another chance, then you have to drag him to a family counsellor and insist that he cleans himself well. Stand over him and see to it that every time he takes off his briefs he washes it immediately.

He is a dirty man. If you are putting him out, do so before his next birthday. You cannot want his money and don't want him, so make up your mind.

Pastor