Christian greetings. I am 24 years old. I am married and I have one child. My husband has a very good job. He earns more than twice I earn for a month. A few months ago we bought our own home and moved in. It is a three bedroom house, and it has two bathrooms. My husband's mother is only 60 years old. She was never married. She has two sons and one daughter. Her daughter is married. And her other son is living with his girlfriend.

My big problem is that my husband wants his mother to move in with us. I am against that. I told him that she is not old and needs care. I believe that it would be better for us to live by ourselves and help to support her the best way we can. My husband is insisting that she should come because she would save the money that she spends for rent. And I am saying that I don't want her to live here with us.

My husband's mother likes to rule and to tell me what I should and should not do. This thing is going to cause us to break up. I love my husband but I do not want to live with my mother-in-law. And if she comes, I am going to pack up and go. He thinks I am joking but I am serious. Please give me your advice.

N.O.,

Dear N.O.,

Let me begin by telling you straight up that I agree with you. Your husband should not insist that his mother comes and live with you. That does that mean that you do not like your mother-in-law. But you know that some mothers-in-law are not easy to get along with. If your husband wants to help her, he should speak to his brother and sister and put money together and help her to purchase a one bedroom flat. And if it cannot be bought cash, they should assist in paying the mortgage. She, I am sure, would feel more independent and you wouldn't have to be sharing with her at all.

I hope that your husband will come to his senses and understand your position, and not insist that she ought to come and live with you and share common facilities.

Pastor