Dear Pastor,

Thank you for the good work that you have been doing. I have been reading your column for many years and I listen to your programme every night. I am a married man and my wife and I have four children together. She is 51 years old and I am 60. I am having a big problem with her. She is not behaving.

She is along with a man who drives a taxi. Everybody in the area knows that she is giving me 'bun' with him. People are talking about it and my friends are laughing at me. Even my big son told me that it is true, and that he talked to his mother about her behaviour and told her he is embarrassed about it. For that reason, my son does not travel in that taxi at all.

house

We bought this house together. We tried to educate the children and nothing is wrong with me physically. I only cheated on my wife twice and I never told her, and that woman is not even living in Jamaica anymore. I went to do carpentry work in the country, and she came by to visit me where I was staying and I fooled around her, and that was all.

I don't know what to do. This taxi man could be my wife's son. She says that she is not having an affair with this man, but I know better, and everybody says that they are together. Please give me your advice.

D.E., St. Catherine

Dear D.E.,

I do not believe that your son would lie on his mother. He told you because he is convinced that his mother is having an intimate relationship with the taxi man and he is ashamed of her conduct. I am sure that he hears what other people are saying and he can see for himself. I don't know the reason why she has become sexually involved with the taxi man.

Sometimes taxi men have been very helpful to commuters and, to them, the age doesn't matter. whether they are in their twenties, middle-age or older, if the women are willing to have relationships with them, they are ready.

Some women would sell their souls for free rides in motor cars. And perhaps this man is giving her money. And, who knows, she might be giving him money too. You may blame the taxi man but, although he is wrong to have an affair with her, it is your wife who has made herself cheap by making herself available to him.

I suggest that you talk to your wife and tell her, although she says that she is not having an affair, that both of you should go and see a family counsellor. And I further suggest that you gather all your children together and have a family discussion about their mother. Make sure she is present. Don't accuse her of anything, but express to the children how unhappy you are. Although you have spoken to their mother about the relationship she is having with this man, she continues to travel in his car.

Pastor