Dear Pastor,

Greetings in the mighty name of Jesus, our soon-coming king. I listen your programme and read your column, and I have heard that you have helped a lot of people, and I, too, need a little help and your fatherly advice.

I have known this guy for 10 years, but we got intimate five months ago. The problem is he does not know how to express himself and all he wants to do is to have sex. He said he doesn't talk that much. When he was a child, his father used to leave him alone 95 per cent of the time with no one to talk to. To me, he seems to use sex as his weapon all the time. I really like this guy.

prayer

I need you to pray for us so he can change and we can be together. I would also like you to pray for me that he will forgive me because, two days ago, I text him and told him it was over.

To tell you the truth, I have been with a few guys and I don't want to be with anyone else. Please pray for us so that we may stay together for a long time. I am 27 and I don't have any kids as yet. People always say the older you get, the less chances you will have of getting pregnant. I can have children and I would love to have them with this guy.

I am awaiting your response.

K.G., St. Catherine, Jamaica

Dear K.G.,

I must give you a word of caution. This young man and you have known each other for 10 years and have been intimate for five months. You claimed he does not talk much. that is ok. Some people are very quiet by nature. others pretend they don't speak much but that is because they don't want others to know much about them. They don't like to talk about the future or give any information about themselves. when they are asked why, they do not say anything, they say they don't talk too much. Most times it is not because they don't talk much, it is because they are hiding something.

If this guy is never willing to give information about his background, to talk about his parents, siblings and so on, that should tell you he has secrets. What do you know about his relatives during the 10 years you have known him? How is it that he can talk to you when he wants to have sex? Think about that.

You are 27. Don't allow yourself to get pregnant because you are so eager to have a child. Get married first. A home with two parents has a better influence on children.

If you really believe this guy has problems in communicating with you, encourage him to see a family counsellor.

Pastor