I remember the first time I saw one of my teachers from primary school buying a bundle of callaloo. Trust me people; I nearly had a small cardiac arrest. True, true! If my heart was brave and bad enough it woulda openly attack me. Because I never believed teachers eat those ordinary, common things.

I also remember getting into a fierce argument with some other kids about what activities could possibly happen in the staff bathroom, because we were all convinced that teachers didn't do yucky things like passing waste matter or breaking wind. As far as we were concerned, teachers weren't ordinary people and we therefore couldn't imagine them eating the mundane things we ate like bulla cake or chicken back or turkey neck. Those were the days when children were innocent and naive, and teachers were revered, respected persons who were held in high esteem by society.

In those days too, one stern look from a teacher could strike the fear of God in children and make a noisy room of boisterous kids suddenly grow quiet. Not anymore. Let's face it; these days it's the teachers who are likely to grow fearful in the face of menacing stares and intimidating gestures from the rugged looking 'big-and-bad-from-dem-born children whom they must face daily.

unscrupulous, unprofessional

So, when, how, and why did the script really change? Could it be due to the fact that economic reality and other factors have contributed to the lowering of the status of the profession? Could it be just a case of children nowadays not socialised to hold certain persons or offices in high regard?

Is it a situation where the isolated actions of a few unscrupulous and unprofessional teachers have so tainted the general image of that occupation, that people just nuh rate teacher? Perhaps it may also have to do with the fact that teachers are mostly women and professions that consists mainly of women hardly ever get much ratings. I'm just saying. What you saying?

I heard a story today about a primary school teacher whose grade one reading session got disrupted and disruptive because a child loudly broke wind. The way I heard it, when the youngster let the thunderous sound rip from his derriere, his entire group of classmates moved away from him in one seemingly choreographed move of revulsion, and started vigorously fanning their noses. Not to be outdone, the guilty youngster started fanning too, and shouted 'miss is not me!'

absurdity

She was battling valiantly in her attempt to not grimace too obviously at the stifling, toxic fumes emanating from the bowels of the small child. She was also struggling hard not to give in to the absurdity of the child's vain effort to deflect blame. And, for one brief moment, the usually stoic teacher just gave in to her humanity.

She fanned the stench from in front of her nose and she gave in to the laughter. After all, although the lady is a teacher, the teacher is also a lady, a human, a person.

I tend to like teacher ladies because teachers are usually real-real ladies, and as one bumper sticker I read some time ago suggested, 'teachers do their thing with class!' In fact, there's a lovely little teacher lady I know right now, who I would personally love to give me some extra lesson or keep in the detention. Well friends, I actually told her how I felt. And in response, she suggested that what I really need is a good dose of spanking! Of course, I started loosening my belt in delightful anticipation, only to discover that she was just joking.

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