Dear Pastor,

I am 19 years old and my boyfriend is also 19 years old. We have been friends for two years. And we are both from Kingston. I got a job in Montego Bay, so I moved there. The night before I left, we had sex. He used a condom. And I went to Montego Bay, and stayed at my sister's house. Her husband's brother and I went out and both of us had sex. I got pregnant. When I told this man that I was pregnant he said he was not responsible, but he gave me money to have an abortion. Pastor, every day my boyfriend calls me but I cannot tell him that I was pregnant.

Do you feel that he will find out when next we have sex. I do not know what to do. Sometimes I feel I should tell him or I should end the relationship with him. Sometimes I do not feel I am good enough for him, but then again I do not want any other girl to get him.

S.K., St. James, Jamaica

Dear S.K.,

Before you left Kingston, you had sex with your boyfriend. And you were only in Montego Bay for a very short period of time before you got involved with another man and had unprotected sex. Your conscience is bothering you. You not only had sex but you terminated life. And while you were pregnant, you were giving your boyfriend in Kingston the impression that everything was going fine with you. You are more than naughty.

Your boyfriend may never know what you did. He may never ask you whether you were faithful to him because perhaps he does not expect you to have another man while you were in a relationship with him. It is solely up to you to tell him or not to tell him. And I say so because I do not believe that your conscience would allow you to continue to have an intimate relationship with your boyfriend. And if you were to tell him, he would never trust you again.

So whether you tell him or not tell him, is up to you. Some men can deal with women who became sexually involved with other men. Some men cannot. You should know the type of man you have.

Pastor